Sometimes, Ryan and I just look at each other, bewildered and amazed that God has given us such an amazing gift. Joel is alive. We love him more than we can even really communicate, even to each other, but in our struggles to verbalize the strength of our love for Joel we can tell that we are both feeling the same thing.
Yesterday we had a moment like that, and I told Ryan that it made me so aware of how different our lives could be, had we not chosen to pursue God on Joel’s behalf. Ryan disagreed and said it made him feel the opposite because he was so aware that he didn’t do anything to justify the blessing we’ve received.
This is a theological line we have walked a tight rope through all year. Does God move because we act, or in His omnipotence are our actions inconsequential? Both are true. Our God is so big and so good that nothing we do could possibly add to His goodness or power, and yet, He chose to partner with us. I think of our children and how we often ask them to help us with things. When I ask my four-year-old to help me cook dinner, I am not asking him because I can’t cook dinner, or because his help could possibly do anything to improve dinner, in fact chances are his help will make dinner much messier than dinner would have been had I just acted alone. However, I ask my son to help me make dinner, because I love him and I want him to partner with me in the task, so that he can learn and grow and just so he can connect with me. If I ask my son to help me make dinner, I wait for him to help before I move forward, and I am not expecting any particular ability or strength from him. The outcome of dinner will not be in any way dependent on my son’s ability, just on his willingness to come help. God asks us to partner with him, just because He is our Father and He loves us. It matters that we agree to partner with God. It matters that we choose to act when God asks us to, not because our actions are so grand, but because our Father is so good.

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