Zoe Grace Green was born on Saturday April 26th at 10 am. She weighed 8 pounds even and was 21 inches long. She is beautiful and wonderful and we love her very much. We have all enjoyed our time adoring her.
Her arrival has made Ryan and I more emotional about Joel. Our family is so different now and it makes us miss Joel and wish he was here even more. He would have loved her!
We have taken so many photos of her. I will post some this week.
A quick prayer request for me. When I was pregnant with Joel and for almost a year after I had him I experienced anxiety for the first time in my life. It dwindled after a year and I pretty much only ever experienced anxiety after that when I took pain medication, (basically the drowsy/loopy feeling you get on pain medication makes me anxious.) So, I avoided major pain medications with my c-section so that I could avoid anxiety and just took ibuprofen. However, I have experienced some mild anxiety off and on anyway since I had Zoe, especially when I’m overly tired, and then feeling too tired makes me fight sleep and my anxiety grows. It is terrible. I’ve been trying to get enough sleep, but with a newborn that is a tough task. Would you please pray for me? I really don’t want to have any more anxiety. I’ve been hesitant to try medication for anxiety because most anxiety meds are sedatives that make you drowsy and so I worry that they would end up increasing my anxiety instead of stopping it. If anyone has a similar experience of becoming anxious specifically when you feel drowsy and took a medication that helped I would love to hear about it, but mostly I would love to be free from anxiety because Jesus’ death on the cross was enough to set me free. So please pray. Thank you.


There are 9 comments for this post.

  1. dc mama on May 6, 2014 9:14 pm

    amy, i had post-partum anxiety disorder after having both my kids, worse with my second, and i wouldnt wish it on anyone, ever. If you feel your anxiety is worsening or that its affecting your life, please see a psychiatrist. i understand not wanting medication but in these specific kinds of cases it may be needed to get you back on track. My psychiatrist actually recommended a very low dose antidepressant for me … Not an anti-anxiety, as those are sedating. i didnt feel any side effect and it really helped get me feeling like myself again. just something to consider. prayers sent, as always. congratulations on zoe’s birth…i love her name.

  2. Lacey Ballard on May 7, 2014 5:56 am

    i have not stopped praying for you since Joel’s heavenly homecoming, so will add anxiety to the list. Congratulations on the sweet little girl – i pray she will be an amazing blessing for you and the family!

  3. Jess on May 7, 2014 10:57 pm

    Definitely see a doctor, there are many mild, low-dose prescriptions that can help you get back on your feet. The doctor will probably suggest a low-dose antidepressant, and a very low dose anti-anxiety medication for “break-through” anxiety. The anti-anxiety medication can be sedating, but the effect usually lessens as your body becomes accustomed to it. Also, the anti-anxiety medications that are prescribed nowadays are specifically targeted at decreasing abnormal anxiety signals and impulses in your brain, so even if they’re sedating, they should still lessen your anxiety.

    I also recommend making sure you get at least 30 minutes of exercise per day (after you are completely healed from your recent birth). It’s been shown that exercise can diminish the extra energy that makes people anxious in the evenings. Our bodies have all this energy, and they don’t know where to put it, so they put it into worrying.

    Of course, remind the doctor that you are nursing (if you are). It might be best to start off with an as-needed low-dose anxiety prescription, since the half-life is very short and you can “pump and dump” and go back to nursing after the number of hours your doctor suggests after taking a dose of the medication.

    Some other good tactics for lessening anxiety:
    1. Take time for yourself
    2. Give yourself an allotment of “worry time” every day, where you let yourself worry about all the things that make you anxious for five minutes. Write them down, and recognize each as a product of your anxiety. If any of the problems are real instead of perceived, then write a short action plan to lessen the effect of the problem.
    3. Eat a filling, healthy breakfast (you’ll be amazed at how much it can help!)
    4. Pick up a craft or hobby that takes a lot of concentration. Check out this article on Knitting, but the same is true of any activity that takes a lot of concentration: http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/25/health/brain-crafting-benefits/

    Know that you are not alone, and so many people are praying for you and your family.


  4. K on May 8, 2014 6:50 am

    I am so glad to hear that Zoe has arrived safely. I’m sure Joel is looking down on you all and adoring her in his own way. I second dc mama’s suggestion to see a psychiatrist. I can only imagine this is a difficult time for you, even with your welcome arrival (babies are crazy demanding, after all, and post-pregnancy hormones probably don’t play well with grief). Even if you choose not to medicate, a trained professional can help you become more aware of your thoughts and become better equipped to fend off anxiety when it comes for you. For what it’s worth, I also took low-dose antidepressants (an SNRI) two years ago for severe anxiety and it helped pull me out of the hole I found myself in. I was able to stop after 6 months and I’m still doing well. In my case at least it really did help and you don’t have to take them forever. I will be praying for your family.

  5. SP on May 8, 2014 1:00 pm

    Congratulations on the birth of Zoe! I can only imagine how much her arrival makes you wish even more that Joel was here on earth to share these moments. You will all be together again, the seven of you for eternity in God’s kingdom and though that does little to satisfy your desire to be with him now it is something amazing to look forward to. Until I started following your family and Joel’s journey that is not something I would’ve said and believed whole heartedly, but because of y’all I now can. Your strength as a mother and as a believer have touched me and I’m forever changed. I know God has worked thru your family to bring people like myself and so many others closer to God. It seems so unfair that from Joel and your family’s suffering you have given so many such a wonderful gift but lost something so precious in return. One day we will understand why and I know we will be very satisfied with the answers, but the having to wait is so hard. I’ll be praying as always for your family and will also pray the additional burden of this post-partum anxiety be lifted from you. I have not experienced this myself but as a physician I strongly agree with dc mama and suggest you speak with your OB who can direct you what to do. There are many great new medications out there that could make you feel so much better so you can be present in the moment and enjoy this time and not have suffer a year of it like before.

  6. Christine on May 11, 2014 9:59 am

    I’m so happy Zoe is here and healthy. I’m looking forward to seeing photos. Thank you for sharing your beautiful family with us. I hope you have a wonderful Mother’s Day.

  7. Amy Farmer on May 14, 2014 9:33 pm

    Congrats on your new baby! I get anxious when trying to go to sleep and I take Trazadone nightly. It’s wonderful. It’s a very low dose old school anti depressant, not a sleep aid. If you are nursing you will probably have to wait til you wean her. Ask your dr. Til then, what about trying essential oils? Young Living makes great ones. Praying for you.

  8. Katherine E on May 18, 2014 11:30 am

    Hi, Amy. I just saw this post, and your anxiety may well be improving by now, but I’ll throw my two cents in, anyways, in case it might be helpful … I have seen some preliminary research that was really impressive and hopeful about the effects of meditation on PTSD — it was a dramatic reduction in anxiety for most of the subjects (and, as i understand it, a large part of PTSD is a really insane amount of anxiety.) There’s a Washington Post article and one from Huffington Post, too, I think. Anyway, meditation, like a little exercise, is not likely to hurt. I’ve found exercise to help me with anxiety, definitely, too. Even a little walking around the block, if you can do that before you get doctor’s clearance for vigorous exercise. . .

  9. Regina Lupo (@ReginaLupo) on June 9, 2014 7:53 pm

    Have you ever heard of Kratom? It’s an herb-God made. It is an amazing ant-anxiety,ant-stress reliever.You may read some non-sense about it that pharm. companies have managed to get out to media. Kratom is allowing countless numbers of people to stop taking Xanax,Ativan,valium ect… and replacing them with kratom. Phar, companies don’t like that. It has truly been a miracle herb for many. 🙂
    Hope you find relief soon,
    Take care,
    I also wanted to say what a beautiful little boy Joel is/was. I can’t even imagine how much you must miss him. He was truly one of Gods greatest blessings…….

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